I would rather give birth again....

....then toilet train.

But then that would mean that 2 years down the road, I would be doing this all over again.

Of all the parent responsibilities, I think I can truly say that I hate toilet training the worst. I'm not sure, but I think it's the ambiguity of not knowing when it will ever end. Everyone says, well they won't head off to highschool in a diaper....they say that because you can't say that the kid won't head off to kindergarten in a diaper. Because that's my kid. But this is besides the point.

I told myself that I would do this once summer hit and I had a week or two I could devote to it without racing off to appointments or whatever. Well, so far, such a week had not presented itself----in fact, I seemed to have had more appointments the last few weeks than normal.

So finally, yesterday I faced the fact that I was not going to get a week or two without leaving the house, and summer was quickly getting away from me, so I decided I had to do it. I bought a dollar store kitchen timer (which doesn't seem to be working ALL the time) to help in the process. My problem before has been that I start off well first thing in the morning, but then suddenly lunch is there and I haven't taken the kid back to the bathroom. We've been buying pull-ups for a while (part of the self-delusion that I've been working on this) so out they came. Good thing they fit a little two year old bum as well as a six.

And so now it's after lunch, my time. I make the kids lunch, clean up while they eat and then put two down for naps and one down for a 'quiet time'. Then I make my own lunch and sit and do computer stuff while I eat. I need this time. It's my refueling time, in more ways then one.

Today I look back on the mornings attempts. About 5-6 stickers doled out--one for every dry pull-up and another if the deed gets done in the toilet. Both kids went through 2 pull ups. One kid did the deed.

I try to recall the morning I started Honour. I had figured one trip to the bathroom per hour would be sufficient (beginners ignorance). And I immediately pulled out the waffleware. Blunder number 2. She went through all 7 pairs in less then an hour. The rest of her training is a blur in my mind---she might have done it herself for all I know.

I'm trying to keep in mind that as soon as we've conquered this, we'll be saving 80 bucks per month. We need that to go to the furnace we bought and the air conditioner I bet we'll have to add to the package, as our current one appears to have turned into the worlds ugliest lawn ornament. That's all rather annoying too. If I knew the extra money could be going towards, oh, the Ikea pantry unit we've been waiting over a year to buy, that might be a little more motivating.

And frankly, knowing that this won't last forever is just not helping matters. I feel like I'm standing in a desert, staring off over hills and valleys of sand....with no end in sight.